This house is a monarchy. Although there are four individual staff members, they all might as well be one person. There is never the voice of reason. The response is alwaysd WE ARE STAFF, OUR WORD IS LAW. How is it that when there was only one woman running this house, there was generally a feeling of peace? I don't know, maybe it was by the glory of God. But then, why is it that whenever we speak to other girls from houses across the nation, they never seem to be able to relate to us? Is our house cursed? The one year we had a stable staff was my Sophmore year. Freshman year there was a new staff member almost everyday. Obviously, I'm exagerrating. Still, it's ridiculous, the amount of crap the girl's house has gone through. If the boys do have problems, they remain internal. No one would ever know. I doubt they have many in the first place. Andy and Lisa have been there forever. Maybe it's the nature of girls in general. Maybe there was some vibe going around this house. Andy used to be staff at the girl's house, but he called it quits and moved over to the boy's house. Why was that transition so easy? Are women that difficult?! When Ansa was here, he was a voice of reason, although it was not needed as often, seeing as a fairly clear sighted woman was at the head. Janine also had our backs when she was here, though sometimes the line seemed somewhat wavy. I don't know, maybe it's because I see my fellow senior badgered constantly and that because we are of the same age, I usually side with her. Still, I do try to understand the staff's perspective. Unfortunately, it always seems that they've forgotten what it's like, maybe even what this program is about. This program is about us. We should have some say and I mean that, as a whole. I feel that when one girl is having an issue in the house, it is everyone's issue. Kathleen was getting upset because Kathy was involved. Kelly kept telling her not to get the we other girls involved. Clearly though, this is our problem too. Once they have struck down the most outspoken of the girls, it seems as though they will look to another target. Now that Shayna has left the program, it's Kathleen's turn. And when we're gone? I think Shawnelle'll be next. Hopefully they'll be fortunate to have a new staff. It seems to me that there is a constant power struggle in this house. Sure, they're staff, they're the adults, the authority, and that whole shebang. But when does what we have to say matter? It seems that in terms of rules, we can only say so much. Whether that little much has an effect is a different story. Isn't this program for us? Aren't we supposed to work together? Why is it that when one of the girls is disciplined, we aren't apart of it? How can we learn to not make that same mistake? It's wrong to expect us not to. We're teens. Somehow rebellion is a part of our nature. No, that doesn't excuse it, but our perspective is entirely different. We're always being told what to do and eventually we'll just get fed up. There needs to be some insight. When Anthy and Ansa and Janine were here, it felt like we had that. Now, that's all gone. We are here to fend for ourselves. Just about the end of Sophmore year, we made a truce to keep issues amongst ourselves and workt hem out together. This is kind of like the way we're excluded from when another girl has issues, but the proportions usually seem more skewed when the staff gets involved. Trouble is, they probably can make that same argument. Still, once we started that, we realized that beef between the girls kind of died down. Suddenly, it became staff vs. girls, with a few traitors in our midst. And I think I'm done. I lost sight of what I was writing. All I know is that this house has been spinning in a vicious cycle for some time now. Somebody has to calm it. Hoepfully we can acheive some of that in the house meeting tomorrow night. The vibes are gonna be sketchy that night.
Other than that, there was more thing to get me hype today. The Linkin Park and Jay-Z thing. Amazing. End of story. I might just go get that CD. And WTF is up with Incubus and Hoobastank on the Halo 2 soundtrack?! Who the heck does video game soundtracks? Breaking Benjamin sounded familiar too. Something Benjamin, anyway.
Well, I'm done ranting for the night. Still haven't done the tee yet...heh. Mr. Styer was saying I could go into marketing with something like what I did last year and that he didn't expect me to live up to what I did then. He said that that was amazing. That felt really, really good. Still, for me to be good in marketing, I have to have good stuff going for a while right? 'Kay, g'nite.
